Things I Won’t Apologise For

chloe alice lily

Johnny once said to me “Chloe, you apologise way too much”. I replied, “do I? Oh, sorry”. I’ve decided 2018 is the year I am going to graduate from being a timid little kitten who mewls apologies at every turn to a tigress who bosses her life and doesn’t give a shit about what other people think of her. I carry a lot of guilt around with me; I feel bad about a lot of things that I probably shouldn’t feel bad about. I say sorry for things that I can’t even help, or things that I have to do to make sure I keep my mental health in tact. 2018, I’ve decided, is going to be the year that I refuse to apologise for those things anymore. I have guilty pleasures but they will no longer be guilty.

chloe alice lily

CUTTING SHITTY PEOPLE OFF

I’m not one for burning all bridges but I’m definitely not going to hold back from distancing myself from shitty people in 2018. When people in your life are constantly negative, bringing you down and making you feel bad about what you do, they’re not your friends. They’re the opposite. Sometimes people in my life make swipes at me unnecessarily, reply with ‘that’s nice’ when I tell them my achievements and then move the conversation back around to themselves or joke around about what I do. These people don’t have a place for me in my 2018. I’ll still be civil and nice because I’m an adult and there’s no place for cattiness in my life but taking a step back, keeping some distance and not letting these kinds of people fuck me around anymore.

chloe alice lily

TAKING 10 YEARS TO REPLY TO TEXTS

90% of the time it takes me an average of 3-5 business days to get back to people if they text me – especially if they text me while I’m asleep. I used to feel so crap about what a terrible replier I was and people often give me a really hard time about it. Sometimes I don’t reply because I forget, other times I don’t reply because I’m not sure how to and I don’t want to seem rude. A lot of the time though, I’m just really busy and I forget. I have a pretty full-on life these days. I blog, I work, I study and when I’m not doing that I’m spending time with my love watching Criminal Minds and eating pizza and then I don’t wanna be sat staring at my phone. I do reply eventually which is what matters.

chloe alice lily

ENJOYING A GLASS OF WINE

I love wine and I have no shame about that. While some people say alcohol is a depressant, I’m not so sure as wine makes me super happy. My favourite is a Sauvignon Blanc and I love to sip a nice, chilled glass in the evening while relaxing on the sofa. There’s a lot of stigma about ‘drinking alone’ – especially when you’re only twenty – but I do not care. I don’t drink to excess; I’m a sensible little bean. I love having a glass of wine to unwind and that is something I refuse to apologise for in 2018. While my New Year’s resolution is to cut back on the amount of alcohol I drink, I am definitely not going to be getting rid of it forever and I definitely will not feel guilty about kicking back with a glass of Pinot when I do.

EATING MEAT

I love animals but I could never be vegan. I have no interest in pursuing a vegan or vegetarian lifestyle and cutting meat from my diet. For months this has been eating me up inside. I feel like I’m not a moral human being. But I crave steak at every opportunity. I eat cheddar cheese like it’s going out of fashion. I respect the vegan lifestyle and know and follow some wonderful vegans. I think what they’re doing is amazing but it’s jut not for me. The idea of Veganuary didn’t excite me and I didn’t even think about doing it for a hot minute. Quite often, I won’t talk about what I’m eating on my InstaStories because I don’t want to offend anyone who doesn’t eat meat but this all ends here. I’m being unapologetically me. I’m a meat and dairy lover and I’m not ashamed and not apologising.

HAVING THIS BLOG

A lot of my friends and family think it’s kind of amusing that I blog. I know they only laugh because they don’t understand but I refuse this year to let anyone make me feel bad about having this little spot on the internet. I love this blog. I love the people I’ve met from having this blog. I love the community that having this blog has provided me. I love reading comments and taking photos. I love that brands actually want to work with me and collaborate to make content that I’m really freaking proud of. I am the happiest I’ve been in years because I have a hobby that makes me grin from ear to ear when I think about it. Not to sound like, super cringe, but 2017 was the year I completely found myself and explored my passions and that’s all thanks to blogging. If I never blogged, I would never have realised how much I loved photography, pitching my ideas to brands, trying out new make-up out to review and everything else that blogging brings (but not paying invoices and scheduling tweets; that stuff sucks). If I never blogged I also wouldn’t have the best girl squad I’ve ever been a part of.

2018 is going to be my year for not giving a crap about what people think of me and only caring about what I think of me. I am never one to put myself first (blame my mother for passing on that trait to me) and always thinking of others. I’m not saying I’m suddenly becoming reckless and selfish; that’s not the case at all. I’m going to just not apologise for enjoying the things that make me happy which includes but not exclusive to steak dinners, Sauvignon Blanc and my blog.

Photography by the insanely talented Mollie Manning.

Bag – Radley
Dress – Nobody’s Child
Jacket – Missguided
Boots – New Look

72 Comments

  1. January 18, 2018 / 5:13 pm

    Yes girl you’re bossing it!!! Love these photos, so beaut. X

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 18, 2018 / 5:15 pm

      ily <3 <3 <3 <3

  2. January 18, 2018 / 5:15 pm

    I just found your blog and LOVE it! It’s beautiful! 🙂 And this post is very lovely and so inspiring! 💕

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 18, 2018 / 5:16 pm

      Ah thank you SO much! That’s so lovely of you! <3

  3. Ayse
    January 18, 2018 / 5:18 pm

    Yes Chloe I love this post I’m definitely one of those people who apologise for nothing aswell and I need to learn to stop saying sorry in every instance! Also these photos look gorgeous! Ayse x

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 18, 2018 / 5:28 pm

      Thank you so much! x

  4. January 18, 2018 / 6:03 pm

    I felt every word of this post and I LOVE LOVE LOVE IT! Good-bye shitty people (I did this at the end of 2017 and mutual friends hated me for it but hey, who gives a…!), goodbye to guilt and instant text replies and goodbye to being judged for your own personal choices. If you wanna eat meat, grab that burger and eat and no one is allowed to give you grief (grief auto corrected to fries but everyone is allowed to handout fries so that wouldn’t have made sense).

    • Chloe
      January 18, 2018 / 6:26 pm

      Ahh yes!! Sometimes you gotta put yourself first, gal! X

  5. January 18, 2018 / 6:08 pm

    Yes to cutting out shitty people! I’ve done that recently and it feels fantastic to get rid of drainers. We need to surround ourselves around real, supportive loyal friends. 🙌🏼 X

    • Chloe
      January 18, 2018 / 6:27 pm

      Yes – we don’t need drainers! We need people who are gonna lift us up! X

  6. January 18, 2018 / 6:18 pm

    LOVED! This post. I’m exactly the same, I’m constantly saying oh’ sorry! It’s becoming such a norm for me sometimes I don’t even realise I’m doing it. I know myself I apologise way too much, and over nothing, it could be walking in the same path as someone and you do that awkward side step say sorry thing. I think I’m going to try and work on this too, tbh I’m sick of saying sorry all the time even when it just slips out my mouth. So everytime I feel it brewing, I’m going to lift my head high (again something I’m not good at) and NOT say sorry! I think I’m a very shy woman, but I think there does come and time when you just need to grow some balls and stick up for what you enjoy in life, like blogging, wearing what you want to wear etc. Really relate to this, great post! Look forward to the next. xxx

    • Chloe
      January 18, 2018 / 6:26 pm

      Yes girl!!! 👏🏻 I’m so glad that my post could inspire you to do the same! Make a list of things you enjoy but people shame you for and decide you’re not gonna let it bother you anymore! ✨

  7. January 18, 2018 / 7:07 pm

    You go girl!!! This year I’m very much focusing on similar things – I’m being more selfish and putting myself before others. I want to spend the year following my dreams and doing what I love and anyone negative that brings me down will no longer be part of my life 😊

    • Chloe
      January 18, 2018 / 9:04 pm

      As you should be gal!! Go you!! 👏🏼✨

  8. January 18, 2018 / 7:14 pm

    So many good points in this post I felt myself nodding my head as I read it agreeing with everything you said! I definitely need to do the same when it comes to fake friends and negative people in my life 🙌🏻 Also loving your blog at the moment keep it up x

    Amy// adultingwithamy101@gmail.com

    • Chloe
      January 18, 2018 / 9:04 pm

      Thank you! That’s so sweet of you to say! Get rid of those fake friends, girlie! X

  9. January 18, 2018 / 7:22 pm

    yes you go girl!! I’m currently doing veganuary and as bad I feel about it I don’t think I’ll be sticking to it when February rolls around and I’m already worried about sharing that on my blog! But you’re right it’s not a plan that is suited to everyone. xx

    G

    http://www.teawithgi.com

    • Chloe
      January 18, 2018 / 9:05 pm

      It’s not for everyone! You’re better than me – at least you’ve tried it! X

  10. January 18, 2018 / 7:25 pm

    I LOVED reading this post!!!! Everything you said I agree with, although I’m actually a pescatarian and I’ve been craving meat lately although I’ve been feeling so bad about it. But your post has actually made me think, I should be doing what I want!!!! Glad you’re cutting people out that aren’t supportive of your goals and achievements, you don’t need them! ❤️❤️❤️

    Love Izzy | http://ADoseOfChatter.com

    • Chloe
      January 18, 2018 / 9:05 pm

      Yay! I’m so glad to hear this! Do what you want and don’t care what others say!

  11. January 18, 2018 / 8:54 pm

    This post is beautifully written and I couldn’t agree with the points you made more! Thanks for sharing 🙂

    Kelseygayle.com

    • Chloe
      January 18, 2018 / 9:06 pm

      Thank you so much!! Xx

  12. Emma
    January 18, 2018 / 9:47 pm

    PREACH IT SIS! These photos are stunning & so is your carefree, unapologetic self!
    Emma | emmadrury.com

    • Chloe
      January 18, 2018 / 10:48 pm

      Ahhh I love u <3 <3 <3

  13. January 18, 2018 / 10:18 pm

    Awesome!!! You’ve totally given me inspiration! I too say sorry way too often… I worry about offending vegans and vegetarians when I say what I eat but no…. (I crave steak and cheese too…) loved this post so much. Bookmarked it so I can re read it when I feel weak haha. Xxxxxx

    lucylovesbeautyxo.com

    • Chloe
      January 18, 2018 / 10:50 pm

      Aww that’s so nice to hear Lucy! Thank you! I know, I love animals and feel so bad but I hate soya milk and could never give up steak!! X

  14. January 19, 2018 / 6:43 am

    I’m honestly so relieved that you mentioned how you felt about eating meat and dairy, because I have been feeling the EXACT same way over the last few months and I was starting to get quite insecure about it. Then on top of that I would find myself worrying that I was being stupid and no one else would feel this way *que endless cycle of feeling shame, guilt and embarrassment every time I ate dinner* so it’s really nice and reassuring that others feel like this too!

    Fabulous post, anyone could read this and take something away with them from it!
    Hope you’re well! 🙂

    xx

    • January 19, 2018 / 6:43 am

      Also, gorgeous photos babe! xx

      • Chloe
        January 19, 2018 / 10:08 am

        Also thanks gal, that was all Mollie tho!!

    • Chloe
      January 19, 2018 / 10:05 am

      With veganism being so trendy at the moment (which I think is GREAT!), it’s everywhere and a lot of my twitter feed are veggie or vegan. Because I’ve received death threats from vegans before, I feel so guilty every time I mention that I had a burger or whatever. But not anymore!! 🙌🏼

  15. January 19, 2018 / 8:00 am

    I LOVED this!!! I spend all of my time saying sorry for tiny little things! Sage constantly tells me that there is nothing to be sorry for, but my little self just can’t fathom that I don’t have anything to apologise for! Well you have inspired me to say sorry less! You are definitely a girl boss and I also absolutely loved these photos, you are stunning! x

    • Chloe
      January 19, 2018 / 10:09 am

      Yes Paige!! 🙌🏼 Say sorry less and be the boss I know you are!! 🙅🏻‍♀️

  16. January 19, 2018 / 11:49 am

    Chlo!!! This post is immense omfg! I adore the point about not apologising for eating meat! I often feel bad too for eating meat especially as I follow some incredible vegans and veggies but I too believe that we’re all entitled to eat what we want and while I admire these people massively, it’s just not a lifestyle that’s for me! Thanks so much for sharing the things that you’re not apologising for, it’s actually remarkably refreshing! xx
    http://www.imjustagirl16.co.uk

    • Chloe
      January 19, 2018 / 5:05 pm

      Ahhh thank you Chlo!! Yes, I respect vegans and follow some amazing ones on my social media but I like meat too much, and cheese, and I don’t like any of the weird nut milks! 😂👏🏼

  17. January 19, 2018 / 1:19 pm

    I absolutely LOVE this post! You’re so inspiring and you’re so right. Do not be sorry for being YOU! x

    • Chloe
      January 19, 2018 / 5:05 pm

      Aww thank you! I’m definitely not gonna be sorry anymore! X

  18. January 19, 2018 / 4:42 pm

    Did I write the first part? I am endlessly saying sorry, I walked around town today saying sorry to people who didn’t even do anything!

    I switched to eat no meat but i couldnt be a vegan, i like proper milk in my tea (sorry not sorry)

    • Chloe
      January 19, 2018 / 5:06 pm

      Yes!! I couldn’t have anything other than cow’s milk in my tea!!

  19. heather nixon
    January 20, 2018 / 5:15 pm

    I’m the same with texts – I take so long but that’s just how I am (although I can’t agree with you in terms of eating meat – sorry) x

    http://www.ofbeautyandnothingness.co.uk

    • Chloe
      January 20, 2018 / 6:56 pm

      That’s ok, it’s a post personal to me! If we were all the same, it would be boring! X

  20. January 20, 2018 / 5:17 pm

    Love this! I like a glass of wine of the evening too and refuse to feel bad about it. Good luck with apologising less this year! x

    • Chloe
      January 20, 2018 / 6:56 pm

      Thank you Emma! Wine is the best!

  21. January 21, 2018 / 8:38 am

    I absolutely adore this! I’m trying to do the same this year – so important to focus on yourself and what you enjoy, especially in a world that expects you to conform to what everyone else is doing! Keep doing you lovely x

    • Chloe
      January 21, 2018 / 3:24 pm

      Yes! Be yourself! X

  22. January 21, 2018 / 1:41 pm

    I love this post!! I agree with everything especially cutting toxic people in your life. Why people want to put other people down, I will never understand why x

    • Chloe
      January 21, 2018 / 3:25 pm

      Thank you!! If someone only wants to bring you down, there’s no room for them in your life! X

  23. January 21, 2018 / 5:19 pm

    I’m exactly the same! I’m a really sensitive person and always worry about what others think and I apologise for everything even if it’s not necessary! This year I’m going to try and be pushier with what I want and be more… well ME! Great post and gorgeous photos!x

    Francesca | EverythingChessie 🌿

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 23, 2018 / 10:10 am

      Yes girl!! We need to be sassy af! xx

  24. January 21, 2018 / 6:19 pm

    I really loved this post Chloe, I say sorry to often too and definitely think we don’t need to apologise. I’m totally with you on the cheese thing, I love cheese way wayy too much and think that is something I would struggle without. Also, what’s wrong with a glass of wine? You enjoy it girl. xx

    Kristy | thevioletblonde.com

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 23, 2018 / 10:10 am

      Exactly – nothing wrong with a little vino! x

  25. January 21, 2018 / 6:43 pm

    You look stunning in your pics, you go girl!! I am the worst at texting back to ahah, but 3-5 business days is so funny, legit me!! Can’t wait to read your blog this year!! xox

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 23, 2018 / 10:10 am

      Hahaha – isn’t is so true though? x

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 23, 2018 / 10:10 am

      <3 <3

  26. January 21, 2018 / 10:27 pm

    I couldn’t relate more! I am always going around apologising for everything, but you’re right. We should stop doing that! I hope I will finally start doing it this year. Good luck to you, girl!

    Larice x || http://hilarice.com

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 23, 2018 / 10:11 am

      Good luck to you as well! X

  27. January 21, 2018 / 10:33 pm

    Yes I bloody love this! I think I’m partial to a bit of this too, but sometimes I can’t help it! Veganuary and being vegetarian isn’t something I could do either, I am very much a eat a whole block of cheese in one night kinda gal but what I do think I could do is cut back on certain days and try some vegan recipes! Also, you should definitely not feel guilty about a glass of Pinot, what better thing to do that sit back with a glass of wine and your favourite Netflix show?! I hope this is your year of cutting shitty people out too, I think I need to take some advice on that one!

    Sarah | http://www.sazsinclair.com xx

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 23, 2018 / 10:11 am

      Hahaha, yes! Cheese, Pinot, Netflix… you’re on to a winner! xx

  28. January 22, 2018 / 7:45 pm

    Good on you girl!! You should never apologise for being you! Absolute boss! Xx

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 23, 2018 / 10:11 am

      Haha, thanks gal! xx

  29. Daena Borrowman
    January 22, 2018 / 8:20 pm

    I really need to take this on board myself! We all need to embrace who we are and not give a f*** who doesn’t like it!

    Daena | http://www.daenalouise.co.uk

    • Chloe Rennard
      January 23, 2018 / 10:12 am

      Yeaaasss!! You go girl! xx

  30. January 24, 2018 / 2:17 pm

    I agree with all the above! especially the blogging one, a lot of people I know just don’t seem to get it. these are really good and you should deffo be unapologetic!

    Lots of Love!
    Alicia | alicia-a-la-mode.com

  31. Shauna Claire
    January 24, 2018 / 8:17 pm

    YES CHLOE!!! I absolutely adore this post!! SO so spot on. Especially with not being afraid to voice your opinions!

    Shauna | http://diariesofadramatic.com

  32. January 28, 2018 / 11:00 pm

    So true, I have so many of the bad habits you mentioned. And it’s a struggle every day to try not feel guilty or judged for the way I live my life. I suffer from severe social anxiety and often I feel incredibly judged for the ways I interact. And I’m trying to learn not to let these things get to me because I need to live in a way that’s good for me, that makes me comfortable but most of all I need to learn to stop saying sorry

  33. January 30, 2018 / 7:55 am

    Good for you Chloe.
    Everyone had their own beliefs and views, we all have our own life to live and I think it can be easily forgotten.
    We live life to please ourselves and shouldn’t have to apologise for our choices just because they may be frowned upon by others who don’t share the same feelings.
    Really inspiring to read and I hope you succeed with your new attitude.

    http://littlemissmelanie.com

  34. Robyn Evans
    January 31, 2018 / 10:12 pm

    This is such a releasing post and the photography here is properly gorgeous ! Good on you gal – I agree with so many of these points, particularly texting back !

  35. February 4, 2018 / 3:43 am

    Absolutely loved this post! This year is definitely the year to stop apologizing for things you shouldn’t have to! I think I need to write up a little list like this, it seems so freeing!

  36. February 15, 2018 / 6:13 pm

    I absolutely loved this!! I feel like I related to literally ever point you made!😳💙
    Keep doing what you do huni!🌼

  37. February 26, 2018 / 3:21 am

    YES to the taking forever to reply one! I respond to my Facebook messages once a week-ish, and I know some people take it to heart, but the truth is that I just don’t check them that often! Sure, I could sit down for an afternoon and repeatedly reply to everyone as soon as they reply to me, but that would eat up so much of my time!

    I like to be busy and always give myself a lot to do, and I know that our conversations are more interesting as they are now because I do more stuff in between each message to tell them about! I think they’ve all accepted that’s just who I am, and this post has definitely encouraged me to do the same ☺️

    Indya || The Small Adventurer

  38. March 18, 2018 / 1:13 pm

    This post is perfect 👌🏻 Somehow you’ve managed to make it personal, yet it can apply to many people. I wholeheartedly agree with each and every point made, I’m guilty too of being far too timid and submissive, allowing others to be a bit too rude towards me or allowing other people’s opinions dictate what I say or do!

    I know this post was from a couple months ago, but with everything that’s going on in the twitter world at the moment I wanted to comment and perhaps remind you of the tough “I don’t give a shit what you think” attitude you really do have. You don’t have to apologise because other people are rude to you, stand your ground and keep going with your head held high! So give yourself a well deserved break, cut the shitty people out of your life, pour yourself a big glass of sauvignon blanc, get Johnny to cook you a banging steak and vent your stress on your blog.

    Most of all, just be happy and do what you want, ignore the pricks. ❤️

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *